I just got done taking a psych survey and I realized how healthy I have become psychologically as of late. I don't worry about being in a relationship anymore, I'm not as obsessive about my studies as I used to be, and I kept answering 'yes' when the survey would ask me questions about having someone to talk to. Three years ago, I don't know if I would have had a clean bill of health, but these days I feel like I'm doing a lot better. I think not blogging has helped -- generally, EVERYTHING was wrong with me when I used to blog.
I've been so blessed lately. Tim and I have conversations about Christianity regulary, and we encourage each other. I get to watch the Lord work in Mike's life since he's going back to church. One of my good buddies Robert became a Christian, and I'll get to watchteh Lord work in his life. I became reaquainted with someone I kinda knew in High School named Gina and she has been an absolute blessing in my life as well. I go kinda crazy sometimes and she is able to bring some sense and peace into my very busy life. I'm still going to a Bible Study at Living Stones and a guy that I work with said he would go with me as well as one of my friends that I really care about and feel drawn to -- it's pretty easy to feel drawn to him because he is an exceptional, and very well grounded human being. Man, I don't know what to say. I used to "bear the burden" of Christianity complaining the whole time, but I am at peace with so much of it these days. The work has not changed, but what has changed is my focus. I care so much more about seeing other people blessed rather than daily reminding God that He forgot about me. That's what the last two years of my life have been about, though, letting God give me joy in the midst of all my trials. I am aware and have been acquainted with suffering, but I don't know if I have suffered when my version of suffering is supreimposed on the global scale and concept of suffering. But that's okay because I'm following the Lord, and there may be a time when I do suffer and it will be legitimate compared to the global concept. Hey, man, if the Lord leads.
In the wake of what happened at Virginia Tech, I realize how much work the Lord has done in my life making me happier and blessing me with people that really like me. My brother once said something to me that I think was really profound. He said he liked it in Liberty because, "I got people back there that like me." I thought there was something so simlpy profound in that statement. I know that I like a lot of people, but I never thought of it the other way around - that people like me. But I think it's the truth. There are a lot of people that greet me very warmly and tell that they missed me when I wasn't at a certain place.
It is good to be love be the Lord; He has dealt bountifully with his servant. I fear it may sound like I'm gloating, but I don't mean to. I used to be such a gloomy person, but the Lord has shown some really good stuff.
